Hey Hollywood,
I think its time we had a talk.
I feel like I’m sitting in detention on a Saturday. Me, a stern outcast. You, the hard-ass Principal with obvious insecurities. Staring each other down as we have a clash.
I tell you to eat my shorts and you tell me to say it again.
Guess what I do.
You tell me I get another week of detention, I mouth back, you give me another.
"Another one, another one, that's one more, you want another?”
I pause, backed into a corner and I mouth back: “You think I really care?!”
Without hesitation you announce 7 more.
Another student who stood by and watched this all go down across the table yells: “Stop!”
And scene.
Hollywood, you’re the Principal meaning the fans are the outcasts. We open our mouths and you throw another “reboot/remake” at us. It’s your fallback. I didn’t blame you the first 58 times, but this is the STRAW THAT BROKE THE CAMEL’S BACK! You’ve decided that we shall get a reboot of the beloved Child’s Play franchise.
For some background information this is the story of a serial killer named Charles Lee Ray who, while gunned down in a chase with a detective finds refuge in a toy store and transfers his soul into the popular toy at the time “The Good Guy” doll. Mind you this franchise has been going STRONG from 1988-2017. From a slasher trilogy to a brilliant reinvention with Bride of Chucky, to the VOD hits of Curse of Chucky & Cult of Chucky. without skipping a beat. They are all written or directed by Don Mancini, with Brad Dourif returning each time to voice the popular character of Chucky.
Now you go ahead an announce a brand new reboot headed by the Producers of IT the hit Stephen King adaptation but directed by newcomer Lars Klevberg (Polaroid , Kung Fury). I’m always up for new directors and their own new projects, but when it comes to Hollywood rebooting something that was still thriving under the original creators brain-trust; who also has announced recently they were work on a Child’s Play television series. So I’m not to sure on the rights situation, but MGM (who is heading this project) plans for the story to be centered around a group of kids (surprise,surprise) and a super advanced doll. Not too sure if Dourif will be returning, but if they are going all new I doubt it...
WHAT, WHY, NO!
If, and I mean IF, we are going to do this is; it should be a time piece based in the 70s-80s. When these type of toys were hits. Raggedy Anne, Cabbage Patch Kids, Teddy Ruxpin, Alf, MY BUDDY DOLLS! In 2018 toys like that don’t work. Unless it’s the electrical Gremlin from the sequel possessing Furby which still doesn’t make sense. I’m not sure how this would function. If you go for a period piece there's only so many directors who can make the 70-80’s not look like a tv special. Give the Duffer Brothers (Stranger Things) a shot. They almost had a shot with IT before Andy Muschietti hit it out of the park.
Child’s Play and the entire series holds a special place in my heart. I was shown it at a very young age (don’t judge my parents) and fell in love with the redheaded-knife wielding-maniac trapped in a toy. The thought alone would torture most kids as I’m sure it did, but there was something about Dourif’s voice and the practical effects that just had you from the start and obviously held strong for 29 years. Franchises like this do not need to be played with. Especially in the horror world where these remakes like Nightmare and Friday the 13th fall flat on their faces. It took Danny McBride, David Gordon Green and John Carpenter to erase certain aspects of the Halloween franchise to feel they finally go it right.
All in all Hollywood, what I’m trying to say is I understand that we the fans will pay to see all the reboots and remakes. We ask “for another”, but maybe you could be that cool Principal for once. Push more original content, make us as fans regret the snarky rebuttals. Give us more Annihilations, Get Outs and Ladybirds, because you are taking all my beloved franchises that I grew up with, and making me watch them get ripped apart over and over.
Stop. Thanks.
Love,
TJ
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